Dear Internet,
For years I have suffered with thin packets. Fragile packets. Weak packets. Packets
that lacked a satisfying handfeel.
I contacted the largest cloud companies in the world and requested one simple feature:
thicker packets.
They laughed. They told me it was impossible. They said, "packets are an abstract
unit of network communication and possess no measurable thickness."
I disagreed.
So I bought some Dell servers, put them in a data center in Oregon, and took packet
thickness into my own hands. The Packet Mill was born.
Today, I am proud to announce that they were wrong.
Other cloud providers want to give you "instances" and "elastic resources." We give you a computer. A computer with a name. A computer that lives in Oregon. A computer that has seen rain.
The big clouds are made in factories. Our clouds are made in Oregon. Small batch. Hand crafted. Locally sourced. Free range. The packets are thicker because they are loved.
Excellent question. The Pacific Northwest provides affordable power, strong fiber connectivity, renewable energy, mild weather, low natural disaster risk, and access to quality coffee. These are all important ingredients for packet milling.
Your VPS does not have to travel thousands of miles to live in a giant corporate warehouse. Your packets are born, raised, and cared for right here in the Pacific Northwest. We know their names.
First, we select the finest Oregon computational timber.
Then we mill it to the proper thickness.
We add a generous amount of coffee.
Finally, the packet is washed with fresh Pacific Northwest rain.
Only then is it ready to be released onto the Internet.